materialistic

Spoiled Children & The Parents Who Steal Their Drive

If we give our children everything that they want, what else is there for them to work for? By giving them everything they want or think they need, we begin building a strong foundation for co-dependency. And this co-dependency may follow them for their entire life.

When I look around at different parent child relationships throughout the course of my life I see many things. In families where the child has been given everything, adulthood is difficult for them. With every snag in the line these adult children are calling their parents for help. These once spoiled young children, are now co-dependent adults that have a very hard time standing on their own feet.

When I look at people who had what would be considered a less pampered childhood, there is more success. These people who have fought their way to the top, have done it because up was the only way left to go. They had nothing. They had no one. They realized they could only count on themselves. By not having much, they were given more drive.

There is a remarkable difference when comparing the lives of children who were given it all, and children who had to fight for what they wanted. As adults it is the difference of what most consider to be success or failure, or better yet “sinking, or swimming.”

As we continue to raise our children, let us remember that they do not need everything everyone else has. Nor do children need everything they want. Why have a life full of costly activities when they would be just as content coloring a picture, playing a board game, or making a craft and spending quality time together? They also don’t need the latest sneakers or clothing, because in 6 months it will not fit them anyway.

When we spoil our children we are stealing their drive. We are teaching them that they do not have to work so hard, and that we will “get it” for them. Do we really want them still coming at 40 asking for help with car payments, mortgages, etc.? Or do we want to raise them to be independent and successful?


Children learn what they live. Question is, what exactly are we teaching this next generation? Children are as simple or as high maintenance as we teach them to be.


Spoiling what we have, Desiring what we have not

Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have, was once among the things you only hoped for. ~anonymous~

I read this quote and it hit home in so many ways. We are all so guilty of this and we do it in almost every aspect of our lives. Working moms want to be stay at home moms, and stay at home moms want to be working. People who are single want marriage and most marriages are seeking divorce.

We think we want that new position until we get it, then wish we had the old one. We think once we obtain material things we will feel better, until we get them. And then we realize we only felt better until the novelty wore off. We think we would rather live under a bridge off love than a nice home and relationship going through some hurdles, until we are homeless. And the relationship is gone. And bridges are burnt.

We think plastic surgery will fix it, until we get it done and realize we are still miserable inside. We think that having that newer car makes us better socially, but with our words we suffer from social retardation. We thinking bragging about what we have will make people like us, only to find out they can’t stand us.

We think so many things, and the results are often opposite of what we think they will be.

So lets not spoil what we have, or live in regret. Our life and where we are is what we wanted at some point. And if we think we want something else and that having that something else will make life happier…. we better think again.

True happiness, comes from within.