spiritual

3 Years & 4 Months …. To Raise A Man!

Due to the weather, no school, and cooped up children today things around the house got a little crazy. Perhaps, the mattress in the living room as a trampoline was not the best idea. There was bickering galore! After time outs, corners, and taking away privileges it was time that the kids and I had a little talk.

The “little” talk turned out to last about an hour and a half. It was a good bonding moment. It was a time to recognize wrong behaviors. It was a time to get down to what the real issues were, they were obviously beyond the sibling rivalry stuff. When we finished  our talk it was time for bed, and we went about our normal routine.

As I tucked them in and had them say their prayers, a sadness came over me. The sadness of how fast they are growing up, and the fact that I’m only in their life 50% of the time. (Obviously not by choice)

As I walked downstairs, I sat, and I thought “3 years and 4 months of  “my” parenting time left and my baby boy is a man. I sat and continued to think, then began to calculate all the hours in those three years he would be at school, playing sports, and hanging out with his friends. As I continued to think tears rolled down my cheeks.

I have 3 years, and 4 months to raise a man! My time with him (and my girls),  is limited. Our time together is sacred. I have very little time, to teach them many important things. I’ve always known this, I guess it was just the reality of it being year 3 already as a single mom, and doing the math on the little bit of time that’s left before my boy is a man.

I guess it’s why I don’t  get a babysitter so that I can be selfish, and do things I want to do. I can do those things when they are grown. Its why you won’t see me reading a book or just socializing when I’m at a skating rink with them, I’m skating. It’s why I don’t take people’s phone calls most of the time, I will get with you when the kids aren’t here. It’s why you don’t see me on the sidelines at their sporting events, you see me coaching. It’s why I help at the school when they need me, attend their field trips when possible, and have school lunch dates with them. The list goes on and on.

I’ve always been very devoted to them, and involved. I have always enjoyed them and felt this is what I was put on this earth to do. I love making their birthday cakes, sewing costumes, scrapbooking, and all the wonderful things that mothers get to do. I don’t look forward to their bedtime, I don’t shew them away. I love them, I respect them, and I enjoy them.

I’m grateful to have always had the awareness about how fast time goes. It’s something I have always been conscious of.  Tonight, was just different.

When you only see them half as much, they grow up twice as fast. And THAT  reality, hit me much harder tonight than ever before. As I retire from the keyboard, I pray:

Dear God,

Thank you for these amazing children,

and for blessing my life with them.

I cherish them, as you know.

Thank you for protecting them,

and keeping them healthy for as long as you have.

Thank you for their intelligence,

and kind hearts.

Thank you for allowing them to inspire me,

and for allowing them to teach me all I need to know about patience.

I pray now that you continue to encourage them,

comfort them,

and guide them.

I pray for a hedge of protection around them.

I pray that they yield to you,

and live their life according to your plan.

Please allow them to make good decisions

and I beg that you heal their broken hearts.

Thank you, for always coming through!

Amen!

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© Angela Bininger and The Empowerer, 2009-2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this websites author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Angela Bininger and The Empowerer with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

11 Steps To A Healthier You

We are all only one phone call, one conversation, one email, or one text from falling to our knees. You just never know when life will take an unexpected change. The best way to prepare for this situation that could happen at any given second is:

1.)  Spread love, its contagious! And most contagious when shown through one’s actions.

2.)  Be true to your word, it is who you are!

3.)  Have character, it defines you!

4.)  Be strong in both mind & spirit, it prevents self destruction.

5.)  Dream it, believe it, & do it! Life is too short for anything less.

6.)  Don’t burn bridges, you never know when you need to cross them.

7.)  Have faith, it keeps you alive.

8.)  Have hope, it increases faith.

9.)  Leave no kind words unspoken, people can’t read your mind!

10.) Live each day as though you were writing your obituary.

11.) Never be too proud to say I am sorry.

There is nothing worse than losing someone you love and feeling like that relationship never reached it’s potential. Live each moment as though it were your last and treat everyone around you as though it were the last time you were to see them.

If everyone adopted this 10 step process into their life, we just might change the world. However, since it is likely that not everyone will read this and adopt this plan… we can only change ourselves.

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Control

As humans we fight for control daily.

Control of our lives,

control of our emotions,

and at times…

Even the control of other people.

It’s not possible to be in control of anything.

Only God is in control.

© 2010 Angela Bininger

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Spiritual vs. Religious

I am a spiritual person, yes. Being religious, however, comes in spurts for me. (Like once every so many years) See, I like many many others felt for a long time that I couldn’t go to church because I would be a hypocrite. That is, however, until a recent situation in the parking lot of a church occurred while I sat and waited on my children while they were at a bible study.

I saw a couple fighting in the parking lot. As he cursed at her, and punched his car I thought “That’s exactly why I don’t go regularly” “That’s why millions excuse themselves for going” the list of thoughts could go for pages, you get my point.

In the next few moments of observing the situation God revealed this to me: “They are here, they are trying. If people came perfect, there would be no need to come. They are striving to do better, who are you to judge as you sit in the parking lot watching while smoking your cigarette?” I continued to think about what I felt had just been revealed to me and everything clicked. I thought “They could be dealing with anything and on the brink of a divorce, this could be their last hope and they are at least trying”, “They could have just buried a son or daughter, anything!”,”Who am I to judge?”

So many people are afraid to believe in God or how real he is because it’s easier to cast judgment and make excuses as to why they can’t. It breaks my heart, because he is real. I’ve experienced it! I don’t go to church regularly, I am not the ideal christian, I still do things I know I shouldn’t, but it doesn’t keep me from talking to Him about it. It doesn’t make me an awful person. It only makes me one more person that tries.

I’m sure God understands that many churches are filled with cliques, backbiters, perversion, and other forms of corruption and that I haven’t really found one that feels like home to me. I feel that He knows my heart, He knows my intentions, and that He speaks to me. He knows my struggles, He knows my strengths, He is my rock!

What I learned about religion, I learned on my own. I wasn’t raised in a christian home. It was something I sought. I tried every denomination you can think of, and Baptist is the one that seems to fit me the best. I’m not a bible thumper, in your face, your going to hell christian. Just your average gal, trying to live her life while maintaining spiritual peace.