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The Birth And Death Of Friendship

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I once read somewhere years ago that friendships are born in those moments that we look at someone else wholeheartedly and say “Ohhhh, you do that too!?” It is in those moments of clarity such as uttering that statement  that will mark the beginning of wonderful memories. 

Through the years I have found that it really is about how much we can relate to others that not only determines the amount of friends we have, but the depths of those friendships as well. 

As we grow and change we will grow together as friends, or grow apart. And if our circle has never changed or has not changed for quite some time, then we may want to question some things. Because if it our circle does not grow or change, then we probably aren’t either. 

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© Angela Bininger and The Empowerer, 2009-2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this websites author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Angela Bininger and The Empowerer with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Butterflies and Goodbyes

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© Angela Bininger and The Empowerer, 2009-2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this websites author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Angela Bininger and The Empowerer with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The Depths of Love

We are fools for love or thinking we have found it only to find out in time…..

“That was not it!”

But one thing is for certain….

we either always love them or we never truly did.

Why Can’t They Love You?

It will not matter how much we love, forgive,  or accept someone. If they are incapable of loving us the way we need to be loved, the relationship is doomed. 

For some love is a lifelong commitment. It is a sacred covenant where they place all of their trust. For others, love lasts until the next best thing comes along. They want the rush and thrills of love without doing any of the work. They need the quick fix.

Thoughts of goodbye may bring anxiety. There may even be moments of panic depending on how it ended. We can suppress the feelings or face them. By facing them we stand a better chance of succeeding the next time. 

When we have given all that we had and loved with all of our heart to have lost; odds are the next time will be the real deal. It very well may be a relationship where all things are reciprocated. In the meantime, keep the faith. Had we not experienced the loss we wouldn’t be ready for that one we are about to meet.

© Angela Bininger and The Empowerer, 2009-2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this websites author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Angela Bininger and The Empowerer with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Love Is Like A Tattoo

I designed this greeting card after having reflected upon my own life as well as the lives of others. Once true love is found; it will always exist.  It may change forms but it is still there somehow. While on some days the flame will be brighter than others; it will never go away.

We may cover it, and we may hide it but still we know it is there. And sometimes others can catch a glimpse of it without us even knowing that they noticed. Like a tattoo, love is hard to hide.

Just as ink covers the body we all long to be covered in love. And just as the ink creates a design that becomes a beautiful piece of art, love paints a picture for us all that we will always hold close to our heart.

© Angela Bininger and The Empowerer, 2009-2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this websites author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.

Do You Stay With The One Who Love’s You, Or Go Back To The One You Love?

I have been asked this question by one of my reader’s and have found other people in my life pondering the same question;

Do you stay with the one who loves you, or go back to the one you love?

I can only offer advice on the topic as I am in no position to make a decision for someone. It is a decision only the person asking the question can answer in their own time.

From my experience, many feel a need to go back. The question is, does the person you love, love you? Or is this a fantasy? Are you just remembering a time in life when things were pleasant, or did you really miss something good? More often than not, the answer is not the latter of the two.

Typically, as the saying goes; there is a reason this person didn’t make it to your future. From what I have observed in my life and others is; people who want to return to a past love, are usually those that are still carrying some sort of guilt from that relationship.  

For example: There are times one may want their ex. But it’s not necessarily them that they want. It is the fact that they are fantasizing and wanting what could’ve been. It is not because it was a fabulous relationship or it would not have ended. Something somewhere was lacking.

There is something to be said for having someone who truly loves you. Beyond the surface, and unconditionally. They accept your weaknesses, they do not judge you and they accept you for who you are. That is huge! Can you talk to them? Is there a good friendship? Because in the end, with years of marriage, the same friendship that started it will be the same friendship that allowed you to grow old gracefully, and together. 

If we love ourselves then we are capable of loving anyone who loves us.  Especially if they are someone we once loved.

We often over analyze our relationships and that causes problems. We are looking for that feeling that went away, those butterflies, the passion, and so on.

Mostly everyone has that “One who got away”. But they must hear these words; they got away for a reason. And the one who loves you, that one that you feel you just cant love you loved them at some point.

What is it that made you once love them?  Are there positive memories?  What brought you together? Do you have any common goals now? Sometimes it is something as minor as no longer having a goal or task you focus on together. Aside from raising children.

Often people get the house, the career, the kids, etc. and just get comfortable. They forget to plan for the next list of goals they want to achieve together. It can be something as minor as taking a dance class together, up to patenting that billion dollar idea. A couple has to have something to focus on in the relationship,besides raising children or they will lose sight of the friendship and love that the relationship offers.

As much as we as humans crave stability, the monotony of life can darn near drive us crazy. Re-invent yourself, find yourself, and most importantly love yourself.  After that, you will have your answer to this question: do I stay with the one who loves me, or go back to the one I love?

While deciding your answer, remember, the grass always looks greener on the other side. You are remembering a person who is probably not the same person you remember. They have grown, years have passed, etc. Odds are, if you don’t find yourself first you will ask the same question again, only this time it will be referring to the one you just left.


© Angela Bininger and The Empowerer, 2009-2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this websites author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Angela Bininger and The Empowerer with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

There Is A Reason God Didn’t Let Them Notice Us Back Then

I see it often, and due to social networking sites along with technology it has become all to easy. Oh yes, the “friend” from the past.

It seems as though many are resorting to that these days. They are turning over every last stone from the past. But what are they searching for? Love? Acceptance? Themselves? A boost in self-esteem? Hope? Confidence? Security?

They are definitely searching for love and acceptance. They are searching for happiness. In most cases, they are validating themselves and looking for confirmation that they are not the screwed up.

They do not do it on purpose. It is not something they set out to do, seek and destroy. Sometimes, things just sort of… happen.  By going back into their past they find joy, peace, love, happiness, acceptance etc. They find it temporarily anyway. 

To them, there is history. This person reminds them of a person who once existed at a time when life was sweeter. They believed in one another. They listened. They had happy memories. They were always good if not the best of friends. And then time and distance happened.

They thought it was fate that their paths crossed again. They were about to be living what they thought would be, the dream life. It was their fairy tale coming true. Or so they thought!

Instead of it being fate, and a dream come true, it more often than not turns out to be another one of life’s lessons. There is a reason God didn’t allow that person to notice people that way when they were younger. There was a reason they were always just best friends. There is a reason it is called the past and it usually means it should not be a part of the present or future. 

Often we cross lines that shouldn’t be crossed, misinterpreting our own emotions. If we are in a state of depression, turmoil, shock, etc., it is easy to get sucked into that fantasy life. That life with no troubles, nothing but passion, love, and happiness. Any new relationship should have those things so don’t let the fact that the person is from your past, fool you.

You are remembering a person as they were then, and it will take years before you know what kind of person they truly turned out to be.

© Angela Bininger and The Empowerer, 2009-2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this websites author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Angela Bininger and The Empowerer with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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