sadness

Just Leave Tiger Woods Alone Already

This entire story breaks my heart. As if the family isn’t enduring enough pain already. This scandal has proved one thing. Tiger Woods is human. He makes mistakes just like the rest of us. So many are bashing him, when they too could have made the same mistakes. Any one of us could have. At the end of the day, we are all animals. We are all capable of this. It occurs in 70% of relationships.

Anyone in his position would have been vulnerable. Why is everyone bashing him verses the home-wreckers that seduced him? How could they not know that he was married? He is in fact, Tiger Woods. Granted, he shouldn’t have done those things. He should have had more character. But what about the ladies? What about the fact that they had no class or morals? It does indeed take two!

Obviously there are deeper issues beyond cheating. Cheating is typically a symptom of a troubled marriage. There are issues in the relationship long before it happens. And typically those issues are because of both people in the relationship. It takes two to make a relationship, and two to break it.

Perhaps everyone should picture themselves getting millions to do what they love, while always away from their family. While one is home taking care of the kids, the other is bringing home the bacon. Any relationship like that, will encounter problems and there will likely be adultery. It doesn’t matter who it is. And when relationships have issues, and peoples needs aren’t being met these kind of things happen. So lets let the family have a little privacy. Please?

Benefits of shared parenting, loneliness can be a good thing!

I guess the topic of conversation would vary from person to person, the circumstances that led up to it may also be slightly different, however, the results are all the same. You are alone.

Loneliness is often just as much of a good thing as a bad thing. It is a great time of  self-reflection, a time to heal, and a time to discover both old and new things about yourself. And discovering those things that got lost along the way, in the depths of a marriage,  are just as exciting as discovering the new ones.

For me, I have shared parenting. At first this was extremely difficult for me. I had never really been away from my children other than an occasional overnight at a relative’s house. When the every other week summer rotation began there was such a huge void there. It felt as though my life would end. Every other week I felt as though I had nothing. SO, as all single moms do…. I buried myself in work.

Eventually I found additional comfort at the library and began to check out heaps of self-help books. It would be nothing for me to walk out with 20 of them at a time. ANYTHING to occupy my mind. What I didn’t realize at the time was that I was helping myself. I was learning. I was growing. And needless to say, I was surviving it. I just kept my mind so busy that I didn’t notice as much.

The one major plus side I see in shared parenting is this:

It gives me time every other week to reflect on the week prior and prepare for the week to come. There is time to  think about things that we did or didn’t do as a family, what could have been done better, should this or that been handled that way, the list goes on and on. There’s always time to self check! One simple example is: How often do you tell your child to hold on, just a second, or wait a minute? Those things are more noticeable after divorce when there is bi-weekly parenting. You catch it, then make an effort to correct it. Once you correct that one you are on to the next, and so forth.

I miss them a ton when they are gone, and anxiously await their return on Sunday nights. Although it is lonely, the lessons I’m learning will allow these children to become beautiful adults. There is nothing better for a child than to have a parent that is at peace with themselves. It gives balance, and allows them to see both love and hope! And there is nothing greater for young girls to see than a woman who is independent, and secure with who she is.

Missing You